Stupid Quotes
"Please provide the date
of your death."
-from an IRS letter
"I was under medication
when I made the decision to burn the tapes."
-Richard (Dicky) Nixon
We've got to pause and
ask ourselves: How much clean air do we need?"
-Lee Iacocca
"A verbal contract is
not worth the paper it's written on."
-Samuel Goldwyn
We understand the importance of having bondage between parents and their children. Dan Quayle
Helpful Warnings: "CAUTION: Knife is very sharp. Keep out of children"
"The people in the Navy
look on motherhood as being compatible with being a woman."
-Rear Admiral James R. Hogg
"If you're killed, you've lost a very important part of your life." -Brooke Shields
"A day without sunshine is like, you know, night."
As far as we know, our computer has never had an undetected error. - Weisert
"We apologize for the error in
last week's paper
in which we stated that Mr. Arnold Dogbody was a defective in the police force.
We meant, of course, that Mr. Dogbody is a detective in the police farce."
-Correction notice in the Ely Standard, a British newspaper
"Caution: Cape does not enable
user to fly."
-Batman costume warning label
"The private enterprise system
indicates that some people have higher incomes than others."
-Gerry Brown
"I have opinions of my own --strong
opinions-- but I don't always agree with them."
-George Bush
"I was provided with addtional
input that was radically different from the truth. I assisted in furthering
that version."
-Colonel Oliver North, from his Iran-Contra testimony
"We are sorry to announce that
Mr. Albert Brown has been quite unwell, owing to his recent death, and is
taking a short holiday to recover."
-Parish Magazine
"We are not without accomplishment.
We have managed to distribute poverty equally."
-Nguyen Co Thatch, Vietnamese foreign minister
"The word 'genius' isn't applicable
in football. A genius is a guy like Norman Einstein."
-Joe Theisman, quarterback and sports analyst
"Fiction writing is great, you
can make up almost anything."
-Ivana Trump, on finishing her first novel
"I've read about foreign policy
and studied, I now know the number of continents."
-George Wallace, 1968 presidential campaign
"We don't necessarily discriminate.
We simply exclude certain types of people."
-Colonel Gerald Wellman, ROTC instructor
The world is more like it is now then it ever has before.
Dwight Eisenhower
Eight more days and I can start telling the truth again.
-- Sen. Chris Dodd (D, Conn.), on the Don Imus show, on campaigning
"The Stupidist Things Ever Said By Politicians" - by Ross
and Kathryn Petras
If you take out the killings, Washington actually has a very low crime rate.
-- Marion Barry, mayor of Washington, D.C.
Those who survived the San Francisco earthquake said, "Thank God, I'm still
alive." But, of course, those who died, their lives will never be the same
again.
-- Sen. Barbara Boxer, (D, Calif.)
"The Stupidist Things Ever Said By Politicians" - by Ross
and Kathryn Petras Joey Bishop (talk-show host): Would you like
to become a regular on the show? Barry Goldwater: No, thank you. I'd much
rather watch you in bed with my wife.
"The Stupidist Things Ever Said By Politicians" - by Ross
and Kathryn Petras You know, if I were a single man, I might ask
that mummy out. That's a good-looking mummy!
-- President Bill Clinton, looking at the recently-discovered Inca mummy
"Juanita"
"The Stupidist Things Ever Said By Politicians" - by Ross
and Kathryn Petras
You read what Disraeli had to say. I don't remember what he said. He said
something. He's no longer with us.
-- Bob Dole
"The Stupidist Things Ever Said By Politicians" - by Ross
and Kathryn Petras
I have opinions of my own -- strong opinions -- but I don't always agree
with them. -- President George Bush
"The Stupidist Things Ever Said By Politicians" - by Ross
and Kathryn Petras First, it was not a strip bar, it was an erotic
club. And second, what can I say? I'm a night owl. -- Marion Barry
"The Stupidist Things Ever Said By Politicians" - by Ross
and Kathryn Petras
You can't just let nature run wild.
-- Wally Hickel, former governor of Alaska
"The Stupidist Things Ever Said By Politicians" - by Ross
and Kathryn Petras
The spontaneous rally will begin at 1:45.
-- Mike Murphy, adviser to Lamar Alexander
"The Stupidist Things Ever Said By Politicians" - by Ross
and Kathryn Petras
I cannot tell you how grateful I am -- I am filled with humidity.
-- Gib Lewis, speaker of the Texas House
"The Stupidist Things Ever Said By Politicians" - by Ross
and Kathryn Petras
Dan Quayle Quotes
(extending his hand during a campaign stop): I'm Dan Quayle. Who are you?Woman: I'm your Secret Service agent.
"The Stupidist Things Ever Said By Politicians" - by Ross
and Kathryn Petras
"It isn't pollution that is hurting the environment,
it's the impurities in our air and water that are doing it."
-Dan Quayle
"If we don't succeed we run the
risk of failure."
-Dan Quayle
"We are not ready for an unforseen
event that may or may not occur."
-Dan Quayle
"Hawaii is a unique state. It is a small state. It is a state that
is by itself. It is a --it is different from the other 49 states. Well,
all states are different, but it's got a particularly unique situation."
-Dan Quayle
"It is wonderful to be here today in the great state of Chicago" - Dan Quayle
It's time for the human race to enter the solar system!
-- Dan Quayle, on the concept of a manned mission to Mars
"The Stupidist Things Ever Said By Politicians" - by Ross
and Kathryn Petras
"I love California, I practically
grew up in Phoenix."
-Dan Quayle
"What a waste it is to lose one's
mind.
Or not to have a mind is being very wasteful. How true that is."
-Dan Quayle
"Potatoe"
-Dan Quayle
Decease your chances of making stupid quotes
by taking some English
lessons and other
language
arts lesson plans. Getting an
online learning
education can benefit you in many
ways.
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